Dear 11/12 year old Vicki,
High school boys are not hot. Stop swooning over them, stop laughing at their jokes when they aren't funny, and don't let them make you feel down. It's okay that you haven't had a boyfriend yet, haven't had your first kiss yet. It'll happen, don't force it, and when it does it won't be as amazing as you think it is right now. You actually do pretty well with the boys later on, and all of them will be hotter than any of the boys you're wasting time on now.
The 'cool' girls are actually no cooler than you. I know you don't believe in the notion of being 'popular' anyway, but the only difference between them and you is confidence. It'll come.
Also, sorry, but those are the only boobs you're going to get, even though people keep telling you that you'll be a late bloomer. And you're not getting any taller either. That's fine because you've got pretty good legs and bum - don't be afraid to show them off. In a few years you're going to discover hair mousse too - it's a game changer!
By the time you leave high school, you'll actually be pretty confident, so ignore all the school reports telling you to speak up more in class. You'll speak up in your own time, in fact you won't be able to shut up in a few years. Try not to stress too much about SATS and GCSE's. They're good and all, but not worth the hours you're going to put into them. Save the academic energy for A Level and Uni - you're going to need it!
I know you don't like it, but try and do some more exercise. Mum would be thrilled if you asked to go on a run with her - and we both know that the only reason you don't want to run is because you think you look gross doing it. News flash! No-one looks good when they run.
Also, help Mum out around the house more. I know you don't think you're being messy, but you really are, and Mum has enough on her plate to be stressing about. Give her a hug when you get home, offer to do the washing up, and lay the table when shes asks - the first time.
Check in with Becca more often. Make sure she's doing okay.
I can't remember if Granddad is still around, but if he is speak to him. I know you find him a little intimidating, but he's not going to be around for many more months. Older you would really get on with him, and wishes she had spent more time getting to know him.
Over the next few years a few of your friends are going to go through some really difficult stuff. Try and be there for them. I know it scares you, and I know you think you're really bad at advice, but honestly you just need to listen to what they're saying. Call them up after school, make the effort to go and see them.
Write more. I know you'd rather be watching TV or going on the PC (what do you even do on it anyway? You haven't got MSN, you don't watch YouTube, Tumblr hasn't even been invented yet!), but writing is so important to you. Read too - even more than you are at the moment.
One day you'll actually prefer the name Tori - so now is the time to make the change!
You're a pretty great kid. Your shyness will pass - that permanent blush you have will fade, and you'll discover make-up. Those friends of yours are sticking around for the long run - even if something your interests differ - and watch out for that tall girl you keep getting paired with in PE. One day she'll be a pretty important figure in your life.
All my love,
Vicki (aged 20 years, 11 months and 19 days)
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