#reviewsdaytuesday: University of East Anglia's English Literature with Creative Writing (Q3W8) Couse

For the past 3 years I've studied on UEA's English Literature with Creative Writing course, and over that time I've formed a couple of opinions on it that might be useful to anyone looking to apply to a creative writing programme.

The course is technically split 75% English with 25% Writing, but over the course of your degree you can definitely move that toward the 50%-50% mark. I took 5/16 modules in creative writing, but two of those are weighted more heavily than the others, and at least 3 of my other modules offered the chance to be assessed on my creative writing rather than writing an essay.

All information I'm providing is based on my own experience and may not be up to date, so please check with the uni website if you're keen on applying for this course.

I'm going to go through year by year, module by module and give a brief explanation of what each module entails and my thoughts about it. This is going to be a very wordy post, which I can only apologise for.

First Year

There are no optional modules in first year for creative writing students (in my experience).

Literature in History 1 - Dossier based module looking at texts moving from middle English through to the 1900s. Taught as a 1hr lecture and 2hr seminar each week, with up to 15 people per seminar group. Assessed in two essays.

- I enjoyed this module, although on reflection I think that was just because it was my first module at uni. I don't think I really took much from it. It doesn't really prepare its students for university study (in terms of what it asks you to read week by week), but the seminar lecture structure is good. I can barely remember anything about it - other than it being the place where I met one of my house/best mates, and that the seminar leader was very good.

Reading Texts 1 - Up to 6 people per 1hr seminar. Subject matter based on tutors interests. I studied Katherine Mansfield and some war poetry. Assessed in two essays.

- I really enjoyed this module. My tutor was very old (picture a classic, tea-stained professor and you're on the right track) so the seminar was very slow but very interesting. The reading material was really good too - although we were given minimal critical work to look over (unlike some of my friends who had critical heavy material).

Introduction to Creative Writing - Follows Andrew Cowan's The Art of Writing Fiction, taught in 2hr seminar. Mostly focused on the craft of writing, with opportunities to share writing but no workshop space. Assessed in two short stories and one critical self commentary.

- My favourite module of first year. A really good introductory course, although I wish we had moved away from the book more often. I could have done 90% of the course by just reading the book. It's also a poor module for people interested in poetry or script, and offers little to no help in that area.

Literature in History 2 - 'Realism'. One book to read per week. 1hr lecture and 2hr seminar structure. Up to 15 people per seminar group. Assessed in one essay and one exam.

- I enjoyed this module too, and it was the one which best prepared me for the rest of my university career - mostly because of its quick turnaround reading times.

Reading Texts 2 - Focus on one longer novel and one critical text. 6 people per 2hr seminar. Assessed in two essays.

- I studied Dostoyevski and Adorno for this module and found it very challenging. My tutor was incredible and really increased my enjoyment of this module.

Writing Texts - Theory intensive. 1hr lecture and 2hr seminar structure. Up to 15 people per seminar. Assessed as one critical creative essay and one standard essay.

- My least favourite module from my degree. The quality of both lectures and seminars was poor - interesting and useful material wasn't delivered very effectively. This was partially due to my seminar tutor's total lack of self confidence, which made my entire class very apathetic about their work.

So, for my first year, I really enjoyed 4/6 modules, found 1/6 'meh' and hated the last.

Second Year

Second year is the year where things count, and it's also the year where creative writing students have a choice in the modules they pick.

UEA splits their modules into A, B and C. I had to pick 3 modules from block A, 1 from block B and 1 from block C (leaving me with two free choices that I could pick from any school in the university). It's also worth noting that block C had only creative writing options.

If you're a non-creative writing student you also get the option to join a creative writing introductory module at this stage, and if you want to carry on to a higher level creative writing module to have a achieve a certain standard (I think 68%).

As a final note, UEA has a ridiculous policy where 40 credits of your degree have to come from pre-1789 literature (or a Y-code module). Each second year module is worth 20 credits, each third year module is 30. I hate this policy with a passion. We are paying £9,000 a year for our course, we should get to study thing we are actually interested in. If UEA wants us to study pre-1789 modules, I think they should make it a larger part of first year study, so students can make an informed decision on whether or not they want to continue to study from that period.

18th Century Writing - Studying 1700-1788. Books include Treasure Island and Gulliver's Travels. 1hr lecture and 2hr seminar, with up to 15 people per seminar. Assessed in two essays. Filled one of my pre-1789 requirements.

- My least favourite module of second year, purely because of the reading list. I didn't enjoy any of the literary texts at all. Lectures were quite interesting, seminar less so but that was probably a combination of the group I was in and my seminar tutor rather than content itself. I took it purely because it filled up one of my Y-code module slots!

Creative Writing: Prose - A workshop based module. Assessed in two short stories and one critical self commentary. Up to 15 people per 2hr seminar group.

- I really enjoyed this module. I love reading and editing other peoples work, and I like hearing feedback on my own work. There is no safer space than around a creative writing editorial table and (apart from one girl who overstepped the critical mark) it was a productive environment to be in.

Creative Writing: Poetry - Half workshop, half analytical. Assessed in two poetry collections, one self commentary and one short essay on another poem from an anthology. Up to 15 people per 2hr seminar.

- I know I have just said there is no safer space than around a creative writing table, but some people in this particular seminar group didn't agree. For a lot of us it was our first time in a poetry specific module, and our tutor expected a lot from us. I personally got on with her very well and really liked that she pushed us, but I know a few other people struggled and found her quite harsh - but that's all personal taste. I liked this module on the whole, although I would have liked some more guided reading through the anthology we were given.

Shakespeare - 1hr lecture, 2 hr seminar structure (up to 15 people per seminar). Almost 1 play per week. Assessed in one essay and one exam. Fulfilled one of my pre-1789 requirements.

- I have very mixed feelings about this module. I loved my seminar leader and group, but on reflection I don't know how conducive that combination was to me actually learning anymore about Shakespeare plays. I found the reading of the plays pretty tough (if you do study Shakespeare try and find a copy to watch his plays, or at the very least read them out with spark notes close to hand!). Most of the lectures were pretty good, although we had one lecturer who consistently overran - on one occasion he looked at his watch and said 'Oh bollocks, I'm 45 minutes in and I haven't even started my lecture yet!'

Contemporary Writing - 2hr seminar with up to 15 people. Almost 1 book per week. Assessed as two essays.

- I loved this module. Although I didn't enjoy all of the books, the seminar leadership and structure more than made up for it, and I always left the class enjoying the books more than I went in. I cannot recommend this module more highly.

Three Woman Writers - 2hr seminar with up to 15 people. 5 books and 5 critical texts over the 12 weeks. Assessed with one essay and one exam. Focused on Woolf, Mansfield and Wharton.

- I have mixed feelings on this module. I enjoyed the books, but didn't get as much out of the critical as I had expected to. I also hated all of the essay questions we were given - it was as if our tutor forgot what we had been talking about in our seminars, or rather picked up on passing remarks and seized them like important points! I generally enjoyed the seminars, however, which says a lot considering it was 9am on a Wednesday morning (and the uni club night is a Tuesday!)

Third Year

As I said above, third year modules are worth 30 credits, so we only have four of them over the year. A dissertation is worth the same as any other module, and is not compulsory.

Creative Writing Dissertation: Prose - 3hrs of one-on-one tutorials spread across 12 weeks. 6,000 word short story with a 2,000 critical self commentary.

- I really enjoyed writing my dissertation. It was hard work, but so rewarding. I wrote a whole post on dissertations, so you can check that out for more in depth thoughts.

Traumatergies - 3hr seminar with up to 15 people per group. Mixture of theoretical texts and literary texts. Assessed through two 5% mini assessments, one 15% 'traumatergy' in the form of essay, creative writing, or any other creative form (I did a scrap book), one 75% written project (although that can also be creative, or sit on the boundary between creative and creative critical). Focused on how we write and think about trauma.

- I loved this module, and it was probably my favourite from my degree as a whole. Very theory intensive, and it is incredibly hard work but so rewarding and worth it. I'd had this module pegged from when I first joined the course and it was so worth it.

Creative Writing: Prose - 2hr seminar with up to 15 people. Workshop based. Assessed in two short stories and one critical self commentary.

- I've really enjoyed this module so far (I still have two weeks left). I love the work-shopping structure, although I know some people don't. As a class, we asked if we could have 3 hours rather than 2 as we felt shortchanged considering the amount of time given to literature students in their final year, and our seminar leader was very obliging.

The Art of Emotion - 3hr seminar with up to 15 people. Theory intensive module. Similar to traumatergies in structure, with two 5% pieces, one 10% project in any format, and one 80% written project which can also be creative. Focused on how we write and think about emotion.

- Again, I've really enjoyed this module. It has been very challenging but so worth while. I'm currently working on my 80% project (5,000 words) and it is tough but I'm getting to grips with it slowly! The module leader for this (same as traumatergies) is excellent, although her incontactability is sometimes an issue.

OVERALL - some points for improvement

I think the structure of the degree is very good, although some first year modules could be improved upon. I think the pre-1789 requirement is ridiculous, as provided people are given enough opportunity to explore pre-1789 texts in first year they should be trusted to decide if its an area they want to pursue.

Online submission of essays should be available for every module except in cases where it limits the form in which the response to a question could be demonstrated (ie, I couldn't have electronically submitted a scrapbook).

The HUB (the admin centre for our degree) is very flawed. Our work rarely gets returned within the 20 day turnaround, and they have been known to lose whole modules worth of coursework. Their email response system needs to be improved.

More meetings should be instigated by personal advisers throughout the three years. I have never felt the need to speak to my adviser about anything, so I have been reluctant to make an appointment with her. As a side note, I do not feel comfortable going to my adviser anyway, as I don't believe she is approachable for undergraduate students (although that is a personal matter, I have found that there are a number of tutors who appear to feel that teaching undergrads is beneath them, luckily I have encountered only one).


I have loved my course and my time at UEA. As much as I have mentioned the negative, most of that comes from an administration side of things. I have got on incredibly well with 80% of the tutors I have encountered and found them to be both engaging and engaged. If you're interested in a creative writing course, if UEA's reputation isn't enough to persuade you then I hope this is!

If you have any other questions about studying at UEA, feel free to tweet me @VickiMaitland (or DM me if it's something more private), or leave a comment below!

Some Love Poems

Since tomorrow is Valentines day, I thought I'd share with you some of the love poetry I've written over the past couple of years. They're not all technically very good (not fishing for compliments here - literally they are technically (metrically, rhythmically etc) not very good), and most are not page poetry (ie. they should be spoken not read). Nevertheless, I'm proud of them in my own way. Also, sorry about all the sex references - apparently my love poetry tends that way (I think to stop it getting too sappy).

I'd also like to take this moment to remind everyone that just because I wrote these poems and they are about personal things does NOT mean they are about me, or any of my former romantic partners. All writing is invention and construction: these are stories in their own right and should be treated as fiction.

** (This poem was originally published by Concrete (I'll add the link when it appears online). The prompt for this piece was 'love on one condition'.)

Sex in a Single 

Some say simply sex is the performance of perfect unity but I disagree. 
You know you're committed to the act when sex becomes mathematics. 

You have my respect when you can show off your A-Star GSCE: 
move shape A to shape B using factor two rotational symmetry. 

Employ Pythagoras as we switch; work out the angle between my hips 
and yours. Get me from my knees to my back via SOH CAH TOA. 

Mirror along the (se)x axis: to-you-to-me, or one-two-three, 
ease my linguistic brain with geometry
to achieve interdisciplinary synchronicity.   
 

We can make love on one condition: 
you can do the maths.

**

The Jumper

He gave me his jumper.

He said it was a trade:

him for it to keep me warm
whilst he was away.
Although the jumper's comfy
there's still something it lacks:

no matter how I hold it

it still can't hug me back.

** (This poem was originally published by 140Story)

She

opened

him. Bent his spine

until he cracked. Dog-eared

the pages of him she liked best;

then left.

**

No Sex

Our red wine lips press against each other
remembering the days his best friend yelled
NO SEX
through the window of a French mobile home.

We listened to him then but now we laugh
and I can taste myself in our kisses.

**

Week 31

I left my baggy T-shirt,

a pair of clean pants
and Mum’s old painting jumper -

the one my uncle bought her

from his trip to Aus in ’89

(’89, the year mum and dad tied the knot,

bought a two up two down) –

You said:

‘You don’t need the pants

In this house,’

I laughed.

Your toothbrush sits in the pot;

Your towel hangs over the door;

My bed sheets smell of sugar beet sweat.

I toss and turn

Caught between the wall

And you.

Your hand reaches out

Pulls me

In.

It is easy how we intertwine.

You twitch in your slumber.

Chewing gum on the bedside table.

I taste your morning breath.

We’re cartographers,

Our fingertips map familiar landscapes.

Sandpaper stubble;

The jut of a hip;

The bulge of muscle.

You were right about the pants.

**

Hello Again!

Hello everyone,

If it feels like it's been a while, then you won't be wrong. The last thing I posted on here was all the way back in September! I made the decision to move over to Wordpress in an attempt to create a more 'professional' blog, whatever that means, a while back, but after a few months over there I've come crawling back here.

So, what's new?

I'm planning on giving this blog a bit of a re-vamp, including sorting through old posts and changing the layout etc. From now on, you can expect to find books and lifestyle posts on here (if you're only interested in the books part, you might want to pop over to my wordpress to check those out). I'm going to tentatively set myself a schedule - one post a week, to be up by midnight on Sunday. I might do more during the week, but I don't want to set myself up for too much just yet.

Next year I'll also be entering dissertation mode, so over the summer I might experiment with YouTube. The reason I use blogs is to have a creative discussion outlet, but I don't just want to be sat typing in both my work time and my leisure time. I'll keep you posted on that!

So for now, welcome one and all! And I'll put up a proper post next week!

Life Update c.July 2013

'I've got lots of post idea's' she said... It's true though! I've just, y'know, been too lazy to actually do any of them... Sorry!

Right, so, life update:

1) Health. After my holiday I felt so big. Every meal I ate whilst I was away was bigger than the equivalent meal I'd eat when I was at home, and I ate more fatty products (LOTS OF CHEESE AND BREAD) than I would normally, so whilst I left feeling ok, I came home visibly bigger. This is despite going for long walks most days (It was an hour round trip to the shop and back). So, to try to rectify both my physical feelings of unhealthy-ness and my actual unhealthy-ness, I've started running. I used to do a lot of running (I was on my junior school's cross country team) and since I've stopped going to my weekly dance classes I've been craving a bit of physical exercise. My stamina is ridiculously bad, so anything to help build that up (so I could run for a bus/ train without feeling out of puff) was always going to be great for me. I'm using the NHS 'Couch to 5K' podcasts to help me out. They're free and as their NHS created they're a safe, healthy way to build up exercise. I'm only just on the second week of podcasts (there are 9 weeks in total) but already I'm feeling better about myself, which is the most important thing. I've also been upping my fruit and veg intake, as well as drinking more water and green tea (with honey - the best drink ever as far as I'm concerned) and I've mostly cut out alcohol (we went overboard with cheap French wine, so I needed a liver break! I was meant to avoid it for 2 weeks, but the weathers been so beautiful that I couldn't resist the odd Pimms and half a lager-shandy in the sunshine). So, yay! Feeling good!

2) Clothes. I have been seriously suffering from post-holiday-poverty, but I've told myself I'm allowed to spend the money I have in my bank account pre-holiday, provided I don't spend any of the money I earn post-holiday. Aaaand both Urban Outfitters and Miss Selfridge had sales on. I couldn't resist. I got a huge oversized bright yellow jumper and an oversized black denim jacket from UO (both half price or less) and I got super bargains at Miss Selfridge - a dress reduced from £50 to £7 and a skirt from £40 to £12! Plus student discount! Love it! Now, no more clothes!

3) FLY. My university is hosting a Festival of Literature for Young people this year, and I got to be part of it! I performed two poems alongside some of my classmates and some international students on a summer school course. It always amazes me how talented the people I know are! Afterwards we sat on the steps and had a drink with the international students - it was great to chat to them, to hear their experiences of the university, to share some of my own and to big up the creative writing courses we offer. All in all, it was a lovely day.

That's about it for now, today I'm going to see The Bling Ring - super excited. Might try to take notes, not sure how it'll go, but either way I'll post a review up here soon (ish, you know how this thing works!)

Best Wishes!

xx

Currently Reading: The Red House by Mark Haddon
Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson
The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

Read-a-thon!

Hullo team! So my life has been crazy busy over the past few weeks! I've had my last uni exams, been saying goodbye to friends, taking over secretarial responsibilities in Creative Writing Society, performing prose and poetry in front of Tim Clare. I feel exhausted.

With all this going on, I've been doing a pretty poor job of reading, so this week I am going to be taking part in an internet wide 'Read-a-thon'. I can't quite remember who started it up, but I heard about it from Jesse (YouTube, Tumblr and probably Twitter's 'jessethereader') and Katrina (littlebookowl). Basically, the idea is that you dedicate as much time as possible with the aim of finishing as many books as you can! Here's my reading list for the week:

She by Henry Ryder Haggard - I started reading this book, Goodreads informs me, on the 21st of March. This was right in the middle of my semester at uni, and so far I've got about 50% of the way through it. I'm really enjoying it, just need to remember to pick up my Kindle again and start reading! I want to have finished this book by the end of the week.

The Hare With Amber Eyes by Edmund de Waal - My papa gave me this book not too long ago and said I'd probably enjoy it. We have very similar reading tastes, and so far he's bang on. Started this book in the middle of April, just starting to get into it now. I'm on about chapter 10, so about 90 pages into the 350 or so. It's a biography of an object (specifically a netsuke) which has been inherited by the author, and he's tracing it's journey through his family. Really interesting so far, so I'm hoping to have finished this book.

The Casual Vacancy by JK Rowling - I know, I know. I've owned this book for ages, I think my grandparents bought it me for Christmas, and I still haven't finished it yet! It's a mammoth book, and I'm about 100 or so pages in, although I haven't picked it up in so long I might have to skim read the whole start of it again, just to get my bearings! By the end of the week I want to have got at least halfway through.

The Age of Innocence by  Edith Wharton - I got this book as a present for my 18th and I still haven't read it yet. However, hopefully I'm studying Wharton next semester so I thought I'd get a head up and read some of her work early! This is only a short book, but I've given myself a lot, but I want to have made progress with this.

Now, because these are all quite heavy going, I'm going to give myself a couple of lighter-hearted things to read in between so I don't hit a reading slump mid week!

VOGUE and Miss VOGUE June 2013 ed - So I've bought VOGUE as I sporadically do, and I think it'll be really good to keep me focused on the heavier stuff. I don't really mind if I don't get too far through it, as I enjoy flicking through over and over again as the months go by.

Creative Writing Society Anthology 2012-2013 - I really want to give this a proper read to see what all my friends have contributed. I'll be reading a couple of poems or short stories whenever I feel I can't go on with my other novels. I really want to have finished this by the time the week is out, as it'll coincide nicely with our last workshops!

Pub Stuntman by Tim Clare - As I said at the top of this post, I had the pleasure of performing with Tim at the tail end of last week. He is an amazing poet and a stand up gent, and possibly had the best put down for a heckler ever. I bought his book there and then, really looking forward to sinking my teeth into some of his work. I want to have made progress by the end of the week.


So there you have it! I'll probably be doing updates on Tumblr as the week goes on, so you can follow my progress on akintoarayofsunshine.tumblr.com

Happy Reading

xx

BEDA: NaPoWriMo

Hullo gang!

So, this month, as I mentioned in my last post, I've decided to take part in two acronym based frivolities this month. How very exciting! The first is BEDA, or Blog Every Day in April. The premise of this is pretty self-explanatory, so expect to see a lot more content from me this month. I'll do a couple more beauty posts, lots of book/film reviews (because I've really been enjoying these), some university advice, that house post I've been promising you for EVER and maybe some other bits and pieces too. We'll see how the mood takes me.

The second is perhaps less well known, but its also pretty self-explanatory. NaPoWriMo is National Poetry Writing Month, where you write a poem every day for the whole of April. This is very similar to NaNoWriMo, but as far as I'm aware it isn't run by the same people as I believe The Office of Letters and Light run Scrip Frenzy in April instead. So a couple of my posts this month just may be my awful attempts at completing NaPo... You've been warned!

Anyway, the sun is shining today, so I'm going to go and make the most of it - I don't know about anyone else, but Springs been a little sleepy in my part of the world!

Best Wishes!

xx

The Come Back Blog... Maybe....

Hello Munchkins! Sorry I haven't been around a lot  at all recently, but I've had a crazy amount of reading, essaying, module-choosing and general life stuff going on. So this will either be a very long post filling y'all in or a very short post that says ahhh so busy!

1) Reading. I've started doing a lot more reading outside my course, which is something I've been missing over the past 6 months or so. Every single book I picked up that wasn't on my course I'd end up feeling really guilty about and never completing, and although I enjoy most of my course books you get a totally different feeling when you read a book you want to read, rather than something you have to read. This left me in a bit of a reading rut, if you will, where I wasn't really enjoying reading at all because it felt like a task. I've never felt that way about reading before, and it made me a bit worried to say the least, especially considering my choice of degree. However, when the year started I set myself a goal on goodreads.com, so I'm trying to read 40 books this year. So far I'm on 10, including books for my course and (most importantly) a couple of other books I've picked up along the way, which I will be posting a review of shortly.

2) Essays. So I've had a couple of essays in since I last wrote, and have also got a mark back for one of them. I got a First!! I'm so ridiculously happy it's a little bit unreal. The only problem now is that now I know I can do it, I'm going to get really hard on myself if I don't carry on getting firsts. Which is a bit silly, as a 2.1 in your first year is frickin' good! But yay! Party time!!

3) Module Choosing. This was STRESSFUL. The actual selecting of the modules was easy enough, but the reserve choices freaked me out a bit. I really want my first choices, so I'm a tad nervous if I don't get them. Ah well, I'm sure I can sort things out at a later date if things don't turn out how I'd like them to be...
For my first choice I've picked: 18th Century, Poetry Writing, Prose Writing, Shakespeare, Three Women Writers, and Contemporary fiction. So this should be good!!

4) General Life Stuff. So, my grandmas haven't been all that well recently, and although its probably nothing to worry about, it's been stressing my folks out a bit, which in turn stresses me out. I guess that's actually the bulk of the life stuff, but it feels like a lot more. Oh, and I'm trying to book a holiday to France and nobody is communicating with me and that's unnecessarily stressful too.
In good news, I'm the new Secretary of the Creative Writing Society! Yay! i am very honoured to have be awarded the role... despite the fact it was only me in the running!

Anyway, so, new plan. I really need to write more, and here is an outlet I really should sue more often. So, here's what I'm thinking: new post, 3 times a week. Either on Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday or Monday, Wednesday, Friday - we'll see how it goes, eh? Also, posts on a variety of things. Sometimes beauty, sometimes book, sometimes general life and sometimes a piece of creative writing. Sound like a plan? Goodo. It's in writing now...

Best Wishes!

xx

Bet Down, Shine Bright

Yesterday at CWS we studied OULIPO poetry (a French movement in which you write with constraints). So, we were each given a phrase and were challenged to write a poem using only letters found in said phrase. Mine was 'Bet Down, Shine Bright' (which I quite like as a little phrase and might to some more work surrounding it). I was quite proud with mine, so I thought I'd share.

Bet Down, Shine Bright

Hit the thing with the ring so it sings;
Now hide.
Tie the tie in a bow then sigh.
Show the bone to the dog,
Show the hog how to sing.
Ding.
The dog shit,
Hit a nit with a net and neigh.
The dog downs egg-nog
Then snogs the hog.
They sit on the bed with high tog.
Now sing!

It is night and the end is nigh.

Write your own! Pick a random phrase of a website and see what you can do with it! It's a lot of fun!

I promise I'll write about finding a house soon, got three essays due in at the moment and another couple of hundered pages of reading to do by Monday, so I'm going to get on that first!

Best Wishes!

xx

Why do we study?

As a student in her second semester of uni, I've been thinking about this quite a lot. Why am I here, what worth does this have, all that kind of stuff. The scary questions, if you will. The days when a university degree meant you'd get a well paid job are long gone. Even the days when you'd be more likely to get a job graduating with a first from a reputable uni are fading fast. So, that kind of the begs the question: in a world obsessed with the acquisition of wealth, why am I paying in excess of £9,000 for my university degree.

Maybe it's because I want to postpone reality for a little bit longer? It's easy to be a student - not in the sense that the work load is easy, by any means, but in the sense that I get given money from the government to live on. I'm not expected to pay my way just yet, or to have a full time job. I don't have to worry about money problems - or at least not to the extent that "grown-ups" (and I use the term to mean adults who are not in full-time education) do. I live a relatively comfortable life - nothing is expected of me. This is very plausible.

Maybe it's because it's what I think I'm meant to do. All my life I've been told to go to uni and get a degree. That surely must have had an effect on me! But, I don't think this is the case with me. I am the first person in my family to go to uni (well, my dad got a degree with open university, but it's not exactly the same thing). I think in my parents eyes, this means I am still a child. They went straight into the world of work - they had far more responsibility at my age than I do now. But maybe they didn't - maybe it's just a different kind of responsibility?

The most likely answer I think, is a love of learning. I really enjoyed school. I know, it's strange, but I did. And I think to succeed at uni you need to enjoy learning - even if you didn't enjoy all of school, then you need to have enjoyed whatever it is you're studying. Me? I loved literature. I love sitting down and reading and for that to be an ok, worthwhile and encouraged thing. I love that I can sit and type this, and that this can be considered helpful for my degree. I enjoy lugging books around with me, seeing their beautiful spines lined up on my bookshelf, ready to be broken.

Ultimately, there's no real answer to this question. it's probably a bit of everything. But it's interesting to think about.

Best Wishes,

xx

Reflection and Resolution

Ok, so it's the New Year. A time for reflection and a time of resolutions. So I guess this is what this post will be about.

Catch-up-time: The last time I posted I was a bit down - not just with a hideous illness that wouldn't clear itself for weeks, but also with life. I felt a bit alone and very lost. However, a couple days after that post things began to look up. Firstly, one of my uni friends suggested we live together, so it's looking like I might actually have the makings of a plan for next year. Which can only be a good thing. As much as I love my family, their constant jibes about how I'm an adult so I should be doing things more independently (every time I ask for their advice) are more than getting on my nerves. Secondly, Christmas happened. I love Christmas, the food, the company, the present giving - all of it. There is something inherently lovely about a time of year when people cuddle up by the fire and give each other things to let each other know they love them. I just like that a lot. When I was little I used to just get excited about the gifts, and whilst unwrapping a present will never lose it's tiny thrill, the act of giving the perfect gift is even better.

All of this hasn't been without it's complications. My 'home-friends' have all been missing the love a little. We didn't really meet up at all through November, which made us all feel unwanted, left out and alone, and all of us were completely oblivious to the fact each other felt like that. It's started to look up again now. I think we've began to realise that the nature of our friendship is changing - its growing into something more mature and we need to be more mature about it. It's so easy to hang out with the home crew because everything just slides back into normal. It's just nice. And I think we're appreciating the good times a bit more now.

Things are looking up now. I'm an optimistic person. That's not always a good thing - it leaves me open to disappointment and heart ache. But I always argue that if I do get hurt I'll mend easier because I look forwards, not backwards. New Years is a time for looking forwards. Here are my resolutions - or rather my goals - for the next 12 months:

1) Stop texting whilst I'm in conversation - I do it far too often and it's just rude, particularly if I'm with people who i don't get to see so often.

2) Update this blog more regularly. I have all these ideas for posts and I never get around to writing them. That needs to change. I'm not promising once or twice a week, but at least every fortnight would be good for me.

3) Compile a portfolio - all this last semester I got given a lot of starting material and was told to write this up to create a portfolio. Needless to say, I haven't done this yet. This is more of a short term goal, but I really need to achieve this.

4) Read more - not just course stuff but I need to make time for reading. If I have some down time, I need to get off the Internet or turn off the telly, put on the kettle and curl up with a book. Recently I read a book that re-kindled my love of good literature (I'll review it soon) and I just spent half of yesterday reading with the fella (I didn't have much choice - he borrowed 'Catching Fire' and powered through it. I fell asleep whilst he read till 1.20am. He took 'Mockingjay' with him.) so hopefully that'll encourage me.

5) Be proactive. I have a habit of doing the easy thing - especially when that easy thing is sit and do nothing. I need to, to borrow a phrase from Hank Green, grab life by the testicles. This is the most important of all my resolution, and it kind of encompasses them all. It's only by being proactive that I'll be able to achieve my goals. It's gone past the time in my life when I can breeze through - I need to work hard. And that's not a bad thing.

And finally, 6) Say no. Over the past term I've found myself getting more and more exhausted. that's why I was so ill - I was too tired. The past couple of weeks have been a whirlwind and I can feel myself slowly getting more and more shattered again. I've got to learn i can say no, and I can focus on myself for every so often.

Be strong, be true, be good and spread love.

TTFN xx

An Apology, A Memory and A Poem

Hey gang, it's been far too long and I have no excuses!!

Anyone who followed the link in my last post will know that I have miserably failed at NaNoWriMo this year. It's not that I didn't have enough time, or that I couldn't think about what to write (I actually had a semi decent plot arc for Toby and friends). Truth be told I was just lazy. I'd forgotten how time consuming it was to write NaNo, how mentally and emotionally draining it was, how much sacrifice had to go into it, and when it came down to it I prioritised my social life (and to a certain (more acceptable extent, Uni work) over NaNo. I don't necessarily think that's a crime, but I am somewhat disappointed that I couldn't see it through - for Toby's sake as much as my own self pride etc.

Anyway, this post wasn't going to be long or rambling, but rather a memory.

I just spent the last five or so minutes battling with a Parker Pen - trying to release it from its packaging, to be precise - and all the time I kept wondering: "Why do these pens need to be vacuum-packed in plastic! It makes this so difficult! Ow, my hand!!"

Then I remembered my childhood, when I used to receive "Barbie" dolls as presents. One of the most fun parts of receiving the Barbe doll wasn't the clothes you could dress her up in, or if you could cut her hair or whatever, but the act of opening the packaging. Barbie came in a box - almost like a shoe box. Firstly you had to remove Barbie and her background from the box. Barbie was attached to her background by wire ties, and I would laboriously unwind each tie, carefully straighting it out in order to remove it without damaging the background. Them, much like the Parker Pen, I had to  carefully remove the clothing and accessories from the vacuum-packed plastic containers. I would do this delicately, careful not to damage the precious items. I'd then lay out everything, and begin to play. Now, this might sound somewhat arduous for a 4, 5, 6, 7 year old girl, but I loved it. It just hit me, at 18, that the magic had vanished from opening a package. And that made me sad.

In other, less depressing news, I have taken to performing my poetry. I know. Considering that I only really started writing poetry in September, that's a bit of a risky move. But it seems to have gone ok so far. One of my poems (about rape) appears to go down really well when I perform it, but I think I'll post that another time, as I enjoy discussions around rape culture in our society. I say "enjoy", I really mean that I don't think it gets discussed enough - it tends to get hidden away when it should be fore fronted for all its issues.

This poem began as a song, but turned into a beat poem. It's called:

 The Girl In The Corner Looking Nervous

She’s sipping spirits from a shot glass,

Praying the scummy boys won’t touch her arse

But, with a skirt down to her knees,

She’s not showing much arse to squeeze.

And she’s only got subtle make-up on,

Wondering how you can be comfy in a lacy thong.

She hasn’t got up to dance;

She thinks you’ve got to wait to be asked.

 

The decadence of the scene perturbs her;

The hedonists and perverts

Clamour all around and make her nervous,

The boys and girls offering service.

She doesn’t like the push and shove at the bar

Would much rather be relaxing in some fancy spa.

She’s wearing perfume by Chanel

As if anyone here could tell!

 

She doesn’t approve of promiscuity,

Although that might change after a drink or three,

But she won’t cause she’s counting her units

And she doesn’t approve of the music.

She thinks all her peers are disgusting

With all their making out and thrusting,

So she just stares at the debauchery with her doe eyes

Sat alone in the corner for the whole night.

 

And her tan’s not fake it’s from St. Tropez.

And she’s knows just what they say:

“You’re far too prim to be in here love,

Why don’t you take off those white gloves?

Take some bobby pins out of your up do,

Show the other girls how you can move!

I’m not saying you’ve gotta get down and dirty,

But it’s wouldn’t hurt just to be a little flirty,

And you never know you  might quite like it

If only you had the balls to try it.”

 

Hopefully I'll start posting more frequently again!

TTFN! xx


Currently Reading: The Old Curiousity Shop by Charles Dickens
Shades of Grey by Jasper Fforde
The Art of Writing Fiction by Andrew Cowan

NaNoWriMo

So, for this month I'm taking part in National Novel Writing Month. The goal is to write a novel of 50,000 words in November. I won last year, and want to make a streak of it. I'm already miles behind and I'm publisghing my noevl on line in a series of blog posts as I go. Scary.

If you want to read my novel follow this link: www.tobyisajuggler.blogspot.com
If you fancy taking part in NaNo: www.nanowrimo.org
If you're already part of Nano, add me as a buddy! My name is CurlyWurly

TTFN! xx

Procrastination and Poetry

It's amazing the lengths I will go to procrastinate. This right here is a prime example of my procrastination. Right now I should be either writing an essay that's due in tomorrow, or reading a text (as in a piece of literature not a phoney-type-text) in preparation for Thursday, or (most importantly) considering the questions set out in yesterdays lecture for today's seminar (yikes). But, nevertheless, procrastinate I shall, and if I must procrastinate then what better place to do it than in front of you, the fine people of the internet. (By the by, if you are reading this, drop me a comment to say hi or what not. It'd be lovely to hear from you - particularly if you are one of the people who are visiting this little blog from the Netherlands or Turkey (as Google tells me you are)).

Anyway. Procrastination. Yes.

(As an aside, there is something slightly ironic about the fact that I had to put myself back to track to talk about procrastination, of all things...)

Yesterday I bought a book for my Creative Writing course called "The Art Of Writing Fiction" by Andrew Cowan. Whilst procrastinating from reading "The Pilgrims Progress", which continues to be exceedingly dull, I began to flick through it's pages. Exercise two caught my eye. It goes pretty much as follows:

Imagine you are sitting at your work space ready to write, what things do you to before actually putting pen to paper or fingers to keys? Each activity is worth certain points.
Fiddling (straighting sheets of paper etc): 1 point each
Almost-work-related-distractions (tidying the folders on your computer): 2 points each
Stalling (tidying your room, making coffee etc): 3 points each
Dreaming (more than ten minutes out of a window, more than five with head on desk): 3 points each
Skiving (writing emails, making phone calls etc): 5 points each
Absconding (gardening, decorating etc): 10 points each

0-10: Completely abnormal, relax.
11-20: A necessary amount, but beware of relapse.
21-30: Perhaps these things should have been done earlier...
31+: Completely abnormal, worry.

Tallying up my points I found I was in the 21-30 category... so not too bad but room for improvement. However, it was an interesting exercise to perform, being self-analytical of things you normally wouldn't notice. It also made me consider how procrastination can sometimes be a very helpful thing, how it can let you get round to those jobs you've been putting off for months or allow you to open your mind to something creative that you wouldn't normally do- which could very well be the inspiration for a new venture.

Speaking of which (classy little segue, I know) I was at my Creative Writing Societies (CWS) first open mic night Monday last week. It was fascinating and totally inspirational. Now, I'm not much of a poet, but since then I've written two pieces, both of which I might perform tonight at their Extra Virgin open mic. Scary stuff. One of the pieces is about rape culture, and I want to discuss it in more depth, so I might post that another day, but this piece I'm happy to post now. As I said it was inspired by the showcase, and when walking home from that the fella said "I can imagine you up there reading poetry about pretty boys". This was the result:

My (Ex)Boyfriend’s Haircut

Pretty Boy;

Floppy Hair.

Across the room,

I stop, he stares.

Feel his eyes
Caress my skin.
Catch an eye;
A cheeky grin.

Skinny jeans

Sit low on hips
Eyebrows raised
He bites a lip

Feel the blush

Rise in my cheeks.
Try to pluck
The courage to speak.

He saunters over

Confident.
Offers a drink,
A proper gent.

One drink turns

To two, then three.
Place my hand
Upon his knee.

Four months I leave it

Resting there.
Then Pretty Boy
Cuts his hair.

Average Boy;
Shaven head.
Think I’ll find
A Pretty Boy instead.



So there you have it. My first "creative writing" output on the internet. Although, as we discussed in my first Creative Writing Workshop, was even constitutes as "Creative Writing"?

By the by, as much as I would love to I can't really discuss the content of either of my Creative Writing classes on here. It's a "sacred space" and all that. Y'know. Gutting. But I am LOVING them with all my heart and soul, despite it being early days yet and all that.

TTFN! xx

Currently Reading: The Pilgrims Progress (Oxford World Edition) by John Bunyan
Shades of Grey by Jasper Fforde
The Art of Writing Fiction by Andrew Cowan